Short circuits in the brain
Sometimes this sour feeling just comes along, just like how some sour liquid fills up a bottle and upon sitting until its expiry date, becomes bitter.I know the balance between repressing the negative feeling and letting it rule over me, but no one said it's going to be easy to employ daily affirmations on yourself. Especially when things are not fine by my standards! It's so tiring to have to remind myself where I stand, how I am feeling, how I felt and how and I want to feel everyday.
I wish life has its better days. Studying is not exactly what I want to do in recent years, even though learning is an absolutely enjoyable process. I do it because there's simply nothing else I want to do. I don't exactly know what I want in life. Koh has been utmost supportive in whatever choices I make. I've grown to be so dependent on him nowadays. I recall that dark period of my life when Daddy suddenly passed away. I heard them say how Daddy must be proud of me for being able to hold myself strong and bring the whole family through that period. What they did not realise was because I had Koh. He knew I could make decisions. He didn't say much. He just stayed around and made sure I could catch him in sight whenever, wherever.
The blotches of sound and image were vivid that day. I lied that I had forgotten. The strange recollection was not faint. I hope to get some blessings from the Higher Order.
JH drops a note at 09:47
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